closing my eyes - realization

      I was daydreaming during mass that it HIT me, the reasons why I tend to close my eyes; not the normal closing of the eyes but the conscious and direct black out of my panoramic view.

    It has been my response to certain things for many years, not really knowing the reason behind the reaction since I really haven’t thought about it much. I was not inclined to think of such things before; I tried to suppress those thoughts and images.

    But I’m trying to understand myself more and this is one aspect of my life that is also a part of being who I am. I need to accept the fact that this is one step of improving myself, knowing my limitations and also my possibilities.

I close my eyes in an attempt to hinder my vision from seeing the truth, things that would haunt me even until the end of my life. Sometimes I’m afraid to accept that reality is harsh upon those who are not ready to acknowledge it.

    I tend to block my senses so that I would not be thwarted by what I’m seeing/hearing for the reasons that I may be ashamed of what I’m seeing and fearing what I’m hearing. It’s like my defense mechanism towards things that seemingly try to put ruptures in my life. Things that cause me to think and reflect that would eventually lead to either a challenge to face reality or an obstacle to your comfort zone. Call me a coward if you want because I am one, but I am also just human who also fears uncertainty.

    Blocking your senses to hide from the truth is like attempting to impede the self from reality itself thus rendering you to isolate yourself from actuality. All you feel is the isolation of emptiness which for some people gives them comfort and peace. Free from all the harsh things in life, a form of running away from reality.

Quote

don’t let your heart run your life.. be sensible and let your mind speak for itself.. listen not only to your feelings but to reason as well.. always remember that if you lose someone today it means that someone better is coming tomorrow.. its true that love can wait forever but its crazy to stubbornly hope for someone who doesn’t even care or understand how you feel.. you deserve to be happy not in the arms of someone who keeps you waiting but in the arms of someone who will take you now and love you forever.

Something to Reflect Upon

Isn’t it strange how a P50 seems like a large amount when you donate it to Church, but such a small amount when you go shopping?

Isn’t it strange how 1 hour seems so long when you’re in Church, and how short when you’re watching a good movie?

Isn’t it strange how everyone wants front-row-tickets to concerts or games, but they do whatever is possible to sit at the last row in the Church.

Just a simply thought.. try to reflect.. u